MEN'S CURE

Nearly everyone wants more sex—men and women. So why isn’t it happening more often?

There are hundreds of reasons. But Men’s Health surveyed 1,000 women and combed through the latest research to narrow down the list to the ones you see on the left.

You’ll find most of the constraints of modern society—time demands, distractions, stress, energy levels.

Recognize any from your life? Click on them and find out how you and your partner can overcome those obstacles—and get back to having more fun!

Endless Bickering

Fighting over serious issues is normal, but bickering can cramp your sex life, says Valerie Davis Raskin, M.D., author of Great Sex for Moms. Unless compromise is easy, “it’s often better to put minor disputes aside,” she says. “You shouldn’t talk over everything endlessly.” In our survey, the most trivial quarrels were about the house. Avoid them by playing to each other’s strengths. Then divvy up the decisions accordingly.

A Houseful of Kids

If tantrums and diapers are polluting your passion, ditch the kids (for a night). “It’s all about creating opportunity,” Dr. Raskin says. “Spontaneity is enviable, but planned sex can be great, too.” Particularly if you’re not getting enough. You know that couple next door? They’re probably in a similar situation, so propose a kid swap. You take theirs on Friday, they take yours on Saturday. If the neighbors are freaks, go home when the kids aren’t: lunchtime. Nearly 40 percent of women would be willing to get busy at noon.

Late-Night TV

Here’s a disturbing set of statistics: Italian researchers found that people with a TV in the bedroom have half as much sex as those who don’t. And yet, 64 percent of couples keep a set in the boudoir. Try getting rid of it. John Stewart won’t mind.

“Getting it on is about putting the brain and body in a passionate state—TV does the opposite,” says Heidi Raykeil, author of Confessions of a Naughty Mommy. Can’t quit? Buy a DVR and watch your favorite shows on weekends.

Conflicting Schedules

Sixty-hour workweeks plus social plans can leave her too tired to tangle. But pumping up the passion at the beginning of your week sets the tone for days to come. If you’re both schedule-driven types, start inserting gym time into your Outlook calendar.

Go to the gym together on Monday or Tuesday: Studies show both sexes experience a surge of libido-boosting testosterone 30 minutes after a workout. Shower and then hit the bedroom. “It’ll zap stress and the sexual momentum will last through the weekend,” says Michael Breus, Ph.D., author of Good Night.

Or start reserving a tennis or racquetball court. Men who play sports increase testosterone levels by 15 percent, according to a Pennsylvania State University study. It’s even better if she is your steady doubles partner (or opponent). The same study showed that women increased their libido-regulating testosterone by 49 percent during competition.

An Extra Slice of Pie

Romantic dinners are nice. But hoovering down that romantic dinner can backfire. Share an entrée to eat less and spark a passionate interaction, says Bunny Crumpacker, author of The Sex Life of Food.

“Choosing a meal together and sharing the dish can boost your sense of cooperation,” she says. Your best bet: Whip up a dish at home—66 percent of the women we surveyed said they’d be more likely to have sex after a home-cooked meal.

Job Stress

This one cuts both ways. Too much stress can be as deflating to a sex life as a litter of puppies in the bedroom. If that’s the case, there’s little you can do at home to fix matters—the change has to come at work. If your work is hindering your sex life, it’s probably affecting your health, too. So have that talk with your boss to clear the air, change your duties, and see if you can free up some hours and some brain space that will revive your love life.

But ironically, a stressful job (or even a dangerous one) involving some level of competition, as in law or sales, can actually improve it. “Real competition can drive up testosterone, which boosts libido,” says Helen Fisher, Ph.D., author of Why We Love.

“Being amped up by a high-powered, high-stress job is more likely to make you more sexually active” than idling in a cushy, low-key career.

Boredom in Bed

A Kinsey Institute study found that nearly one-quarter of women reported some distress in their sexual relationships in the preceding month. One of the most common causes of dissatisfaction: boredom.

“The common denominator of satisfied couples is that they’re very playful,” says sex therapist Ava Cadell, Ph.D., author of The Pocket Idiot’s Guide to Oral Sex. “My definition of sex is adult play. It should be fun and recreational. You should laugh and release all those pleasure endorphins. A sense of humor is an essential ingredient in great sex because it takes pressure off performance.”

Toys = instant play. Shop together at a toy store (the kids’ kind) for playthings you can bring into the bedroom. Imagine the possibilities with washable paint, masks, water pistols, and toy handcuffs. Or go to babeland.com for the real deal.

Stuck in a Routine

The average man’s sex life stays the same or even improves once he ties the knot. To ensure this outcome, do what good pitchers do—throw changeups into your nightlife at least once a week.

“Novelty is good for sex, and I don’t just mean novel sex. Novelty in your social life,” Fisher says. It can be as simple as skipping dinner to play miniature golf or listening to a live band instead of the car radio.

Anything that makes the start of your evening less predictable can change up the ending, as well.

Her Body Image

The way a woman feels about her body correlates with how inhibited she feels in bed. Sure, complimenting her shoes validates her taste, and saying something about her eyes reinforces her beauty.

But praising her most guarded body parts—butt, thighs, waist—may be more important to your sexual satisfaction. “Women spend their lives trying to look good for men,” Fisher says. “So a woman who feels she’s sending the right visual signals is pleased with herself.”

The surprising part: The very best time for a “nice ass” shout-out is when there’s absolutely no chance that you’ll be having sex soon, like before you walk into her parents’ house for Sunday brunch. “It’s a gift to compliment her outside of the bedroom,” says Fisher. Praising her body at times other than when there’s a bulge in your pants reinforces your sincerity.

Speaking of body image, men, have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately? Maybe that’s part of the problem. A weight-loss and workout program like our Belly Off! system could be just what you (or both of you) need.

Her Wardrobe

A long flannel nightgown is a clear message that she’s not ready for sex. But buying her an uncomfortable lace teddy isn’t going to change her mind—especially if she has body-image issues (see No. 9).

The key here: make her comfortable. Start slowly: Buy her a pair of flannel boxers and a cotton tank top. She feels the comfort; you see some skin.

As for you, maybe it’s time to retire the ripped Megadeth T-shirt. Get some plain dark-colored T’s, switch to boxer briefs, and see what happens. Attention to your own appearance sends a positive signal.

Source: Men’s Health

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Here are 10 tips for women to stay fit and healthy:

1.    Staying fit and healthy starts with a balanced diet. Know and monitor the right weight for your age. Consult your doctor to learn what food you should avoid and follow your eating discipline routines. If you are trying to lose some weight, foods with high calories should be omitted from your meals. Food with high fiber and low fat should be included a priority in your grocery list instead of red meat, sugars and fats.

2.    Drink plenty of water. Drinking at least eight glasses of water everyday. This cleanses the body from impurities. It is also advised for lactating women to increase water intake to keep the body hydrated.

3.    Take Vitamins and Supplements. Do not forget your Calcium supplement.  Sufficient Calcium intake is beneficial for women of all ages. This has been proven to prevent having cramps and Pre-Menstrual Period (PMS) Symptoms. It also prevents Osteoporosis especially for menopausal women. Vitamin E boosts strong immune system. Women who undergo menopausal period should take Vitamin E-400 as it stops night sweats and hot flashes. Also, Vitamin E is said to be best in avoiding wrinkles when aging.

4.    Quit smoking. If you are smoking, stop. It is also a big “NO” for pregnant women, as this will affect the health of the baby. Pregnant women who smoke may pass the harmful content of cigarettes to babies through the bloodstream. Recent studies have shown that women smokers are more prone to diseases than men smokers. Women who smoke have a high risk of getting breast cancer. Also limit your alcohol intake.

5.    Incorporate exercises in your daily routine. Take a walk after work, use stairs instead of elevator or play with your kids when you are at home. Home exercises are also effective especially when you do not have time to go to the gym and would like to lose some weight. Yoga and Pilates are only a few of the many effective exercises you can do at home. Exercises help in limiting the risk of cardiovascular diseases.

6.    Avoid stress. Many women are prone to too much stress. Stress has been known as cause to many sicknesses. As much as possible take time to relax. Read a good book, hang out with friends and engage into sports. Pamper yourself by going to parlors or you can do some shopping. And do not forget to get enough sleep to revive your energy.

7.    Use sunscreen to protect your skin from the harmful rays of the sun. Wear hats when under the sun to protect your skin. Too much sun is bad for your skin. The skin is prone to cancer when exposed to too much sunlight. It also speeds up the aging of skin cells, which causes wrinkles to women.

8.    Make sure to visit your dentist to keep that beautiful smile. Always have it cleaned to prevent cavities and bad breath.

9.    Visit your Gynecologist. Women who are eighteen and above should have their Physical Examination annually especially for the Pap Smear test. Women who are forty and up should have their mammograms and the Breast self-exam is encouraged once puberty has been reached and should be a habit as they mature

10.  Safe sex is strongly recommended. Use condoms to prevent sexually transmitted diseases.

If you’re looking for the G-spot, you should know that this famous spot is a small area behind the pubic bone and surrounding the urethra. This little area is highly sensitive and the source of much sexual pleasure for some women, as the penis going inside the vagina rubs against the G-spot. In order to stimulate the G-Spot, men should position their penis for a thrust that is opposite to clitoris stimulation. A penis that curves upward has the perfect shape to strike the vagina wall in the area around the G-Spot, while men with downward curvatures may want to try the doggy style.

And now let’s move on to the practical part of the talk around the G-spot. I’m sure that you are eager to get right down to it and get your hands (or at least a finger) on the little bugger. Some men see this as a challenge and as something of a duty because they think it their duty to give their ladies the best possible orgasms. And that simply has to include a bull’s eye hit on the G-spot during every sex session. Stimulation of the G-Spot has also seen heavy use at the hands of sex experts who promote it as a bonus for happy couples and a true miracle for men who fail to please their ladies.

One of the things you want to keep an eye on is your lady’s reaction. As you get closer to the spot, she might instinctively pull back to avoid the direct stimulation of that sensitive spot. This could get you off the course and searching in the wrong area. You also want to begin the search only after your partner has been properly aroused. You could even wait until she had an orgasm and take it from there. The more aroused the woman, the more likely she is to feel the difference in sensation between the G-spot and the rest of the vaginal wall. Apply firm pressure and watch your lady’s reactions. She will guide you to the target.

The G-Spot can also be stimulated using the finger or tongue. It would require a 1 to 3-inch penetration of the vagina. No exact distance can be given since it varies from one woman to another. Experts found that changes in tissue structure occurring beyond the age of 30 make the G-Spot easier to reach. This is why some women in their thirties believe they are experiencing their sexual peak. The fingers are your best bet anytime, but there are also specially designed vibrators that can be used for stimulation. However, it is preferable to find the G-spot first with your fingers and then start poking around with the vibrator.

And finally, don’t be depressed if you failed to find it on the first try. Just think that you get more than one chance to finger your lady at will. Work on it and you will discover the G-spot sooner or later. On the other hand, if your lady simply lacks the higher sensitivity in that particular area, then that’s that. Don’t despair; there are other ways of dealing with the situation. You can always rely on the clitoris, the only organ dedicated exclusively to sexual pleasure, to get your lady over the edge and put a smile on her face.